It's not a case of poison, rape, or slaughter.
You're my lawyer - argue like you oughter.
I'm suing him for stealing my three goats.
A thing you have not proved by endless quotes
From Livy on the Mithridatic war,
And Marius and Cannae and still more,
And cries of "Madness! Punic perfidy!"
And flecks of spit that everyone can see -
Now try and get my three goats back to me.
Non de vi neque caede nec veneno,
sed lis est mihi de tribus capellis:
vicini queror has abesse furto.
hoc iudex sibi postulat probari:
tu Cannas Mithridaticumque bellum
et periuria Punici furoris
et Sullas Mariosque Muciosque
magna voce sonas manuque tota.
iam dic, Postume, de tribus capellis.
Thursday, April 17, 2008
A Latin Lawyer Poem
Exercise from Latin class today: translate Martial. Some of his stuff is not suitable for human consumption, but this one is just snarky: